Mastering Anger with Stoicism: Finding Calm in the Unknown

In today's fast-paced world, it's not uncommon to find oneself grappling with feelings of anger without a clear understanding of the source. The confusion and frustration that accompany these feelings can be overwhelming. However, the ancient philosophy of Stoicism provides a roadmap to navigate these turbulent emotions, offering tools and insights that remain strikingly relevant today. Drawing on Stoic principles, let's explore how to manage and understand unexplained anger.

1. Focus on What You Can Control

One of the foundational teachings of Stoicism is the distinction between what's within our control and what's not. When anger arises without a clear cause, remember that while you may not control the emotion itself, you can control your response to it.

2. You Control How You Respond

Your reaction to anger is a choice. Instead of being swept up by the emotion, take a deep breath, and decide how you wish to proceed. As the Stoics believed, our power lies in our reactions.

3. Interrogate Yourself: Put Yourself Up for Review

Ask yourself: Why am I feeling this way? Is there a hidden trigger? Self-reflection is a powerful tool in understanding our emotions. Delving into your feelings can often illuminate the hidden sources of your anger.

4. Don’t Suffer Imagined Troubles

Sometimes, our mind amplifies situations or creates scenarios that don't exist. Recognize if your anger is stemming from imagined slights or hypothetical situations.

5. “The Best Revenge is Not to Be Like That” – Marcus Aurelius

If someone else's actions or words have triggered your anger, remember that responding in kind only perpetuates the cycle. Choose a higher path.

6. Focus on Process, Not Outcomes

Anger often arises from unmet expectations. Instead of fixating on outcomes, focus on your actions and behaviors, which are directly within your control.

7. Find a Way to Love Everything That Happens (Amor Fati)

Embrace every experience, even anger, as a part of life's tapestry. Each emotion is an opportunity for growth and understanding.

8. Journal

Writing can be therapeutic. Documenting your feelings can help in understanding and processing them. Over time, patterns may emerge, providing insights into triggers and effective coping strategies.

9. Prepare for Life’s Inevitable Setbacks (Premeditatio Malorum)

Anticipate challenges and setbacks. By mentally preparing for difficult situations, you can face them with equanimity and grace.

10. Ego is the Enemy

Recognize if pride or ego is fueling your anger. By keeping our ego in check, we can approach situations with humility and openness.

11. Stillness is the Key

In moments of anger, seek stillness. Whether it's through meditation, deep breathing, or simply taking a moment to pause, finding inner calm can dissipate the intensity of anger.

In conclusion, Stoicism offers a rich tapestry of wisdom for managing the complexities of human emotions. When faced with unexplained anger, these principles guide us towards introspection, understanding, and ultimately, peace. Embracing the Stoic way doesn't mean suppressing emotions but rather understanding and channeling them effectively.

Hatch's Cave List

I almost lost my cave list a month ago when Google did something strange. I was able to recover it after spending several hours looking at the cache. It's backed up at several spots now, so hopefully that won't happen again. 

I haven't been to a new cave yet this year. I need to change that soon.

  Hatch's Cave List

New Book: Acetylene Gas

 At the recent NSS Convention I met several authors who are also cavers. One of them was Dwight Livingston, a caver from Maryland. He read an excerpt to us.

From the Description:

"Young teacher and historian Terry Potzlikowitz suffers an unlikely home improvement accident and finds himself pitted against a gang of desperate project cavers deep inside the largest cave in the world. Alone, offline, often close to death and worse, he improvises and perseveres in the harsh underground. For Terry, gear and technique go only so far, and survival is more a question of spirit and resolve.

A caver's fairy tale, this humorous novel explores a fictional world, one that pushes the envelope of nature to extremes but stops well short of the supernatural. The fairy here is a small mammal. The monsters here are humans with suspect motives, and a cold and indifferent universe. Can Terry learn to survive in this odd and useless place, and can he win the respect, and perhaps the hearts, of the caver community that inhabits it?"

If you're interested in a book with a lot of caving, written by a real caver, check it out.

Choose Fulfillment Over Happiness

In our journey through life, it's important to reconsider our aspirations and shift our focus. During this time of reflection, we often receive well-intentioned yet outdated advice, particularly when it comes to our careers. The idea that happiness should be our ultimate objective has been ingrained in us, but some experts argue that setting our sights on fulfillment is a more valuable pursuit. Here's why. 

The Pitfalls of Chasing Happiness 

The conventional notion of happiness is often tied to achieving specific goals or reaching significant milestones in life, such as landing a dream job, owning a home, or getting married. The problem arises when we associate our happiness solely with these external factors. This mindset can lead to disappointment because our happiness becomes contingent on acquiring and maintaining these conditions. In reality, true happiness cannot be constantly pursued—it's already within us. 

Why Choose Fulfillment Instead Contrary to happiness, fulfillment is not a finite destination. It is a continuous journey that involves living a meaningful life aligned with your values. Pursuing and engaging in things that you're passionate about and truly matter to you, such as traveling, cultivating hobbies, contributing to causes you care about, and nurturing meaningful relationships, can bring fulfillment. 

The Pursuit of Fulfillment Opting for fulfillment rather than chasing happiness offers several advantages. By embracing fulfillment, you can better cope with a range of emotions, including disappointment, sadness, loss, and anger. The ability to experience a wide spectrum of emotions enables personal growth and resilience. Instead of fixating on an elusive state of perpetual happiness, you can appreciate the richness of life's ups and downs. 

Embrace the Journey When you focus on fulfillment, you can create a more gratifying and sustainable life. By dedicating yourself to what truly matters to you, you'll find a sense of purpose and contentment. Embrace the diverse array of emotions that life presents, from joy and excitement to boredom, disappointment, sadness, fear, anxiety, and even embarrassment or shame. Remember, fulfillment is not a fleeting destination; it is the ongoing pursuit of a life well-lived. As you navigate through your own personal journey, consider shifting your perspective from seeking happiness to prioritizing fulfillment. By doing so, you'll embark on a path of self-discovery, growth, and genuine satisfaction.

Important Note: There are people in life for whom the Destination is more important than the Journey. If you are one of those people, embrace who you are and ignore all of the advice I gave here. Being true to yourself is ultimately more important.