Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Hatch is Fat

Good God almighty. I am completely and utterly fat. I've known this for a while but now I'm angry about it. I decided to take a walk at the end of my lunch break today so I set off down the residential street behind my office building. The sidewalk was almost completely shaded and it was about 82 degrees outside. I know from past experience that 110 strides at my normal pace is approximately 1/10 of a mile. I walked 330 strides down the sidewalk then turned around. A few minutes later my back and my hips start aching. By the time I made it back to the building, I could barely stand up. I look like I lost a wrestling match with a lawn sprinkler.

I know Heff and Uncle Bull and Frances are going to chime in with lots of advice, but do me a favor and don't. I have to do this myself. I'm not going into a lot of detail, but it basically comes down to eating less and exercising more. I weighed 324 pounds this past Sunday morning. This morning I weighed 322. It's not much, but it's a start. My hate will make me stronger.

8 comments:

Paul said...

224? are you using some system other than base 10?

Paul said...

all kidding aside, good luck.

Heff said...

No advice, just a statement. You're in the worst shape of your life. The "point of no return" is staring you in the face. Do something NOW. I don't wanna see you as the highlight on some shitty t.v. show as the guy they have to bring a crane in for to wipe his ass.

Anonymous said...

AMEN Heff! You can do it HATCH! You soon will need to be chasing a small todler around all the time. Better get in shape now!

Wayward Hatch said...

I'm not depressed. I'm pissed! Three years ago I did a 9 mile hike with 1000 feet of elevation change. I hiked/climbed a cave that ran for about 2 miles underground and I had to swim out the last 100 yards with hiking boots on. Today I couldn't walk half a mile without stopping to let my back and hips take a break. It's just pitiful. Feel free to rag me as much as you want.

Heff said...

....So much for Hatch's PG Rating !

Paul said...

Bringing in a crane to wipe his ass? It wasn't that long ago he had to bring a paul in to wipe his ass, and he was 10 pounds lighter then than now. What it comes down to, ladies and germs, is that he CAN do it, once he really wants to. I remember when he did his "3 months of fitness", and I was impressed. The problem is, he hasn't wanted it badly enough. I'm a'hopin' that's hate we're seeing in his bloodshot eyes, and that he wants it now.

Anonymous said...

If you come to Maine again to visit, you can have lobster, but NO BUTTER dude! ;-)

Karlotta